I Reject Your Reality And Substitute My Own
by EvilCat22
Summary: DEAD
1. Default Chapter

"I reject you reality and substitute my own"

Characters and Settings borrowed from Ranma ½ and other Works. I do not own them and I am not making any money off of them. Pleas don't sue I have no money.

(thoughts)

"speech"

Another language

EvilCat: just a side not this is my first attempt at ff so if its bad … well it will die a slow and painful death I suppose

In this universe all things have a place a time and a reason, unless of course they don't but that never happens unless of course you're me. That's right as it turns out I am a bug in the big old computer we call existence. The thing is I didn't always know this. I suppose I should start at the beginning or at the end depending on your point of view…

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

On a cold winter day in country up north that most call Canada and other call too bloody far north there is a side walk. On this side walk is a UN note worthy young man. He's about 19, 5, 9 dirty blond hair, blue eye's and a frown on his face. If you saw him only one word would come to mind average. This particular specimen of avrageness was named Matthew that's right me and I was having a bad day and it was about to get a whole lot worse.

I walked along crunching the snow under my sneakers with only one thought on him mind. (Must never forget coat in winter) and with that mantra in mind I trudged at a brisk pace for my home. What I didn't see however was a small patch of ice. Not vary note worthy true but on this day it was the most important patch of ice in the world.

Slip " Gahhhh!" crack…

"Well fiddle sticks". Not much for words was I but what I was soon to discover was I had more then just banged my head. As I got up something interesting happened. Okay not so much interesting as bland and unexpected.

(okay this is not the side walk) as I looked around I notice a few things first off I was now in a waiting room but my first thoughts on that room would be best to describe it.

(Okay grey walls, chairs, clock, old magazines receptionist at a desk and a number dispenser. empty Yup it's a waiting room) the receptionist was dressed all in black with black hair done up in a pony tail with a black ribbon.

"Um ware am I?"

"pleas take a number"

"okay" rip as I looked down I noticed something, it was a vary badly faded 1.

"Now serving number one pleas go into the door on your right." (Okay this is odd) as I went in the door there was a man there. He was well fat and bald and he had on a lavender suit. He seemed vary happy to see me.

"Welcome to the department of pointless souls Ill be your reassignment agent!"


	2. My New Life As A What?

I.R.Y.R.A.S.M.O

Chapter 2

"My new life as a what?"

There I was standing in fort of the silliest looking man I had ever seen. "You're my what now? And what was that about pointless soles." He looked confused for a moment then a look of realization crossed his face.

"That's right you don't know do you?"

"Know what?"

He looked at me for a moment then sat down in his chair and put a business like look on his face.

"Well for starters my name is Mr. Lavender and your dead. You see you fell and smashed you skull on the sidewalk". I blinked a few time as I digested this

"Okay…..go on." He smiled and nodded and began to speak

"Good, good you got over that quickly normally it takes a long time to get over that. Anyway when people die where do they go?"

"Umm heaven?" he seemed surprised.

"No boy, don't be silly they go to be judged, then they are sent to where they deserver to be." I thought about it for a second

"So I'm being judged then?" he raised an eyebrow.

"No. you my friend can't be judged. That's the whole reason you're here. You see people are judged on one thing how close they come to achieving there destiny." I sat down on his desk and looked him straight in the eye. If there was one thing it was I was a fast thinker and I had all ready put two and two together.

"So what your saying is I have no destiny". He seemed impressed.

"You catch on fast boy"

"Well I try"

"Good to know as I was saying you having no destiny can't be judged and as such this office was made to deal with souls such as yourself." He smiled.

"So far you're the only one … ever"

"O joy and rapture."

"You represent a great opportunity for us." I shrugged

"Lucky me. So I take it you want me to do something"

"Why yes." He stood up and walked over to a file on a shelf on the back wall. He picked it up and flipped it open.

"This is the complete history of an entire universe." I looked at him like he was nuts

"Its one page."

"Yes well it's in the angelic language it only needs to be one page". I could buy that I guess. He began to read from the page

"In this universe there is a child about to be borne with no soul."

"Well that's a dilly of a pickle isn't it?"

"Yes vary anyway we want you to be this child, it is vary important it be there"

"Umm no?"

"Well to bad you don't have a choice"

"Fiddle sticks"

"You'll be sent right away. Good luck you'll need it." I narrowed my eyes

"I you de realize that I hate you with a fiery passion that rivals that of a million suns." "That's nice good buy o and by the way the girls name is Ami minuzo."

"What!" and in a flash of light I was gone.

When the light passed and I could see again all I saw was white. It took me a few seconds to realize it was a ceiling I felt kind of dumb.

(Okay so where am I now, let's see I can't seem to move my head, it's warm and fuzzy? O it's a blanket. A pink blanket. O I get it I'm in the maternity ward… and I'm a girl. I hate my life.) It was at that point I was picked up by what I guess was a nurse. I was carried in to a stereotypical hospital room where a tiered woman was lying in bed. They began speaking.

(What the... o great I have to learn a whole new language. This just gets better and better.) I was passed to the woman in the bed my new mother I assumed. She began to fuss over me in a typical new mother way she seemed vary happy despite my total lack of understanding the language. At that point another woman walked in. the chatted amicably for a few moment as the nurse left I picked up the name Nadoka but other then that I grasped none of the conversation. The woman who came in leaned over to me and started making baby noises.

(Ironic the only thing I can understand and its gibberish.) I frowned at her just out of spite. She seemed upset about it. I know it was mean but it made me feel better. I thought about crying but decided not to after all if I was who I thought I was then I hade a battle coming and when it got here I was going to be ready. After all I hade more then 12 years to plan.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Evilcat22: hey all thanks for the reviews they have been a big help despite the rudeness of one of them. hopefully the rewrite has made my story more palatable. Next Chapter seem me grow up, see me screw up, see me blow up!

Until next time remember "The Universe is a beautiful and wondrous place, and it wants to kill you."


	3. A Book A Book, My Kingdom For A Book

I.R.Y.R.A.S.M.O.

Chapter 3

"A book A book, My Kingdom For A Book"

By My 8th year of life I had managed to keep everyone in the dark about my past. Most people just assumed I was just a shy little girl who liked books. Even my new mother was under that impression although she was concerned about my interest in rare and old books and artifacts. You see I had come to the conclusion early on that that would be the key to the upcoming mess. No civilization could span an entire solar system and not leave something behind. I think she rely started to worry when I managed to get part time job at the crown arcade to earn money. Man was that a pain to get, the conversation with the manager went a little like this…

"Please"

"No"

"Please"

"No"

"Please"

"No"

"Please"

"No"

"Please"

"No"

"Please"

"No"

He finally relented after about 3 months of that and of course the puppy dog eyes. All I actually did there is wash dishes but it paid. I did need the money once "Mom" refused to keep paying for my habit but after a hundred or so books I couldn't blame her.

Unfortunately said habit got me well know in some circles. That was both good and bad, it made it easier to come by books and the occasional artifact but it was also going to make it harder to be inconspicuous when the battles started to attract attention.

Only a few of the books id obtained were of any actual use, most where just legends about evil and demons and such, one book id gotten my hands on did point out something that I was hoping not to be.

"Anything goes school of indiscriminant grappling by Happosie… crap"

I had all ready been suspicious of this because of my "aunt Nadoka" but id hoped I was wrong. At least I was never engaged to Ranma, boy was that an odd discussion.

"Mom."

"Yes Ami."

"I was umm ah just reading this book about history and I came across a part about arranged marriage and I was wondering if that was still done?"

"Of Course not honey."

"So I'm not going to say find out about a fiancée that has been arranged for me?"

"No."

"You're sure? No family promises or obligation for the past?"

"I'm sure honey."

She looked at me strangely for a few weeks after that but I was six so she eventually forgot about it. My main supplier of books was an old American man by the name of Mr. K. Oss that worked at an antique shop near my house he mostly dealt with the mystical so it was perfect for my needs. I never asked about his name I always thought it would be better I didn't know because the possible inclinations of that were just too horrifying.

The most use full book I ever found was in a museum. It was more of a tome due to its size and age. The problem was it was closed under a glass case and was not aloud to be removed for any reason but I had to get that book at any cost. I didn't have the money to purchase it legally or illegally for that matter. There was only one option. I had to steal it.

I started by buying what I would need a black bodysuit that covered everything but my hands feet and face, a glass cutter, black kungfu slippers with added rubber grips on the bottom, 75 feet of black rope, a grappling hook head, a climbing harness, black climbing gloves and a black hood with mask. Then I waited.

About a month after id found the book and bought my supplies I got my opportunity, mom had a night shift at the hospital. As soon as she was out the door and out of sight I made my move. I put on what id dubbed my shadow thief outfit and made my way to the museum avoiding all people lights and main walk ways on the way there it took an hour to walk. When I got there I moved to the south side of the building. It had the least light and lowest roof only 2 stories. After id tossed up the grapple and made sure it was steady I made my way up the wall once I made it up I saw something I wasn't expecting. Another wall, this one 4 stories.

"Well fiddle sticks this is going to be unpleasant." It took my 7 tries to get the stupid grappling hook up and steady. Then it took me a good 30 minutes to get up the dam thing.

"Note to self 8 year old girl not best climber." Once on the second roof I made my way to the skylight and proceeded to realize I didn't bring a plunger to pull the glass up after I cut it.

"Tar!" this glass was going to make a lot of noise when it hit the floor 6 stories down but I rely wanted that book.

"Well luck favors the foolish." And with that I cut the window out and watched it fall straight down on the head on the only guard on this side of the building. Not only did it not make any noise it knocked him out.

"That was either vary good or vary bad o well." And with that I lowered the rope and proceeded down it. When I got to the bottom I walked over cut open the display case and picked up the tome. It was about 45 pounds.

"Note to self think things thru." It took me 4 hours to get up the rope and home with out being seen by anyone. Man that book was heavy. After I got home I when straight to my room. I put my gear under some floor boards under the carpet in the back corner of my closet. I then put the book on my desk and opened it.

"I've never even seen this language before; this is going to take a long long time."

A week later a news story broke about the theft. The guard made a full recovery after they put a metal plate in his skull and the police had no leads. They were offering a meager reward for any information about the theft. I felt kind of bad about the guard but the book had to be more then worth a little guilt.

I enrolled in gymnastics the next week so I wouldn't have that same problems if I ever had to make another theft and to increases my over all physical condition. It was a little out of the ordinary for the image I was trying to make but it couldn't be helped.

By my 10th birthday I had managed to translate the book into English and write it in to 5 smaller books. The original was then put in a safe I had purchased a mounted behind a picture of mercury on my wall. I couldn't help about the picture it was just to amusing when all things were considered. The safe also house a number of magical artifacts I had managed to get my hands on. The love koi rod, the true voodoo papers, a sample of drowned girl water form Jusenkyo, one unexploded happo dariken; I hade two but one blue up in my face, and the blue rainbow crystal. Apparently this universe was a little different. The crystal was apparently found in the chest of a boy by a surgeon trying to save his life when he was hit by a car. After id found it id put the word out for the other crystals in the circles I had been known in cause you never know. I also used some of the information in the 5 silver books as I was calling them to hide the safe from magical viewing. You cant be to careful after all.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Evilcat22: well there chapter 3 what do you think as I promised I got blown up ah well see you next time and remember "The Universe is a beautiful and wondrous place, and it wants to kill you."


	4. It Worked For Souron Why Not Me?

I.R.Y.R.A.S.M.O.

Chapter 4

"It worked for Souron, why not me?"

Now that I had the books translated I had to put them to some good use. They contained a whole bunch of useful tidbits like the hide form magical viewing protection. Who would of thought that a permanent marker some old words world be so useful. Unfortunately they also had something in them I was not expecting. In a chapter in one of the books on binding magic to an object it used the sailor scouts as an example. Basically according to the book there magic was bound to there soul. If that was true then I would never be able to become sailor mercury and if that never happened my knowledge of future events would be useless since everything from that point forward would be drastically different. So my goal was clear I had to find a way to fake it.

With the knowledge in the books I shouldn't have too much trouble doing it. First according to the book I would need a power source. As much as I would love to have the power of an entire planet at my back and call the earth was taken and mercury was a tad out of my area code. I would have to use something closer at had and easy to deal with and luckily I had obtained just the thing I would need a few months ago.

I was in the back of Mr.Oss's store looking for books one day. The store wasn't large but it was big enough for his needs. It had the smell of an attic or perhaps an old library . It was dimly lit because of all the displays in the front windows but that just added to the atmosphere. I had just found a book that might be useful when I was called up to the front of the store by Mr.Oss .

"Ami Come up here" I put the book back on the shelf and made my way to the cash register in the front of the store.

"Yes Mr.Oss" he smiled at me in a grandfatherly way and took a box out form behind the display case next to the cash register. The box was nothing special just cardboard.

"I was just sent some interesting items form an acquaintance of mine and thought you might like them."

"O? Let's see what you have" he opened the box in an overly dramatic fashion. After he had done so he took out a small bottle of water about the size of a coke can. It had the picture of a woman on it you often find on the front of bathrooms.

"I was told that this water has the power to turn all it touches into a young girl. Its form a valley deep in the Chinese wilderness."

( Jusenkyo water where in the name of god did his friend get that. )

"What else did you get."

"Not impressed eh well how about this. It makes anyone snared by it fall in love with the caster." He proceeded to take a small fishing rod out with a suction cup on the end of the line instead of a hook.

( Crap that's the koi rod, ill have to buy it just so I won't have to deal with it later… maybe ill just burn it or something)

"Is that all?"

"Well no but I would have sworn a young girl like you would kill to get you hands on something like this"

"Yes well I never said I wasn't going to buy it I just what to know what else?" He nodded and took 3 strips of paper out.

" If you write something on these papers and stick them to some ones back they will be bound to do what they say"

( Where the hell did he get this stuff! )

"And last but not least a mysterious blue crystal that was found in the body of a young boy after he was hit by a car. The Surgeon said that it appeared in a flash of light the moment the boy's heart stopped."

( A RAINBOW CRYSTAL!)

"Ill take the whole box put it on my tab." He put on a big smile.

"Of course of course I knew you'd want these." As I left the store with my new purchases only one thought was on my mind. (There goes my money for the next six months)

I chuckled at the memory it would take me at least another 5 months to pay it off. The rainbow crystal would alone be worth the price if I could get it to work as a power source. It took me a few hours of trial and error following the books instruction to see if it would work and how much power it would provided.

As it turned out it wasn't any great amount. I was hoping for a fraction of the silver crystals power but it turns out its one of those whole being greater then the sum of its parts deal but it would have to do. Next I would need some kind of medium for the power. After a permitted raid on my mother's jewelry box I found something that would work perfectly. It was a silver ring with a sapphire imbedded in the band. Once I had liked the two together I used a binding spell to make it so that only I could use it. Happily the link mad the ring indestructible. Now that I had a power source and a medium to use it I would need to link spells into the ring. This turned out to be considerably more difficult.

_**BOOM! **_

"_**GAAA MY ROOM"S ON FIRE!!!"**_

_**BOOM!**_

"Hmm my hands frozen to my desk…"

_**BOOM!**_

"….. Since when did I have purple hair?"

_**BOOM!**_

"Hmm nothing happened." A Block away a dog was suddenly turned inside out.

_**BOOM!**_

"Wow Free gold!"

_**BOOM!**_

"Where did my desk go? O it's on the roof across the street."

_**BOOM!**_

"My gold's gone!"

_**BOOM!**_

"_**GAHH GIANT SPIDER KILL IT KILL IT!"**_

_**BOOM!**_

"YES! I got fog woo! Now if only I could do that without exploding."

I eventually got it to work after a couple of years and thousands of attempts. I could put up glamour and change what I had on into the standard mercury fuku with full fancy transformation flashy colours and all. The disguise field to hide my identity was separate but that also meant I could put it up at any time. A mild defense, speed, agility and strength upgrade, unfortunately I couldn't get that one to turn on or off it was permanently locked into the ring at all times. I would have to be careful not to show it. The Icy Fog and a few other neat little things that may come in handy if push came to shove.

I never did kill that spider. It turned out to be fairly smart so I kept it in the buildings basement. I named it Blinky. As a side note we don't have a rat problem anymore and the cat belonging to the lady two doors down went missing.

Now that I had this I had to test its limits. I knew just how to do it. I got out my thief outfit, it was too small now but with what I had in mind after a few alterations it would be just what I needed. A few weeks of work and a new pair of gloves and slippers and I had what I needed. It looked like a stereotypical ninja outfit. After I activated my disguise field I looked like a short ninja girl not a 12 year old playing dress up.

Now that I had the look there was only one thing left. I was off to Neirma. I went on a Sunday when I was sure my target would be there. As long as my timing wasn't horrible. It took a wile to get directions to the Tendo dojo as people avoided me but I got directions eventually. When I got to the front gate it was about noon.

"Finally the Tendo dojo"(wait that didn't sound like me?)

"I am a Person" ( yup defiantly not my voice I guess the disguise field alters my voice to sound older, Neat!) I looked around and it looked just the same as you would expect it to. even the sign.

" To challenge Dojo to savage combat use rear door. Well I might as well be polite." I went around to the back door and found a bell. I shrugged and pulled the roped 3 time.

**DONG! DONG! DONG! **I quickly covered my ears man that bell was loud. After a Short time the door opened and a girl, by the look of the apron, smile and long brown hair Kasumi greeted me.

"Hello, pleas come with me and ill announce you. May I pleas have your name."

(Not likely)

"No." She stumbled but manage to regain her balance before she fell.

"O my" Her had went up to her mouth in a way only Kasumi could do right. I think I managed to rattle her cage it was kind of fun. When we arrived at the Dojo she went in first. I heard some fait talking for inside but it was too low to understand and you it. Kasumi came back out and signaled me to come in. As I walked in I looked at those there.

(Let's see Akane Nabiki Soun GENAMA AND RANMA! SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! IM TOO LATE ) I managed to keep any apprehension out of my eyes and thankfully my mask covered the rest. At that point Soun stood up.

"Hello my name Is Soun Tendo the owner, so you've come to challenge this dojo?"

"Yes"

"Her Voice is so cold" I didn't catch who said it but it came from over by Akane and Nabiki. Soun looked at me for a moment.

"I have retired. Would It be Acceptable For my soon to be son in law to fight in my place?"

(Why of course id like to be pounded into the floor. Well I wanted to test the limits.)

"Yes."

"I don't fight girls." Ranma spouted indignantly

(YAY!)

"Fine then don't its not your dojo anyway you pervert!" One guess who that was.

"Now dear I know this is new but as your fiancé it is his duty to protect the dojo."

"IM NOT A PERVERT!"

"YES YOU ARE!"

"NO IM NOT YOU TOMBOY!"

"ARG!" And with that she pulled a mallet out of no where and smashed Ranma into the floor.

He wasn't moving.

"Umm Tendo old friend perhaps we should let her fight. We have after all only been here a couple of days." And with Genma's words I know had a good idea of when in the Ranma time line I was.

(This early in I might just stand a chance especially if Akane fights.) Ranma still wasn't moving.

"My opponent is incapacitated if he is not replaced you forfeit."

"Ill Fight you." Yup of course Akane would jump at the chance to show up Ranma. Still nothing for his broken form.

"What at the Rules?"

"Akane are you sure abut this?"

"Yes daddy. Anything goes if you win you get our sign."

(What a foolish set of rules.)I smiled under my mask

"Your terms are acceptable." Soun nodded and me and Akane moved to opposite sides of the dojo.

"Begin" and with Soun's words Akane attack. She ran at me head on as she cocked back her right are. When she made it half way across the dojo I gestured with my right hand. From it shot a Thick Stream Of bubbles. Akane panicked not expecting this and threw her arms up in a cross block. As the bubbles impacted in to her arms they burst into a thick for that filled the dojo.

"I can't see" My smile grew as I felt the temperature of the dojo drop to sub freezing.

"Your cheep trick wont help you win!" she was panicking I could here it in here voice. I lepta and grabbed on to one of the beams that ran along the top of the dojo. I pulled my self up so I was standing on the beam and out of the fog. Akane ran and attacked my last position. Then slipped on the layer of ice that was now forming on the floor and skidded into the wall. I would have expected more noise at this point. They were probably being quiet because they still couldn't see what is happening.

"COME OUT AND FIGHT FAIR!" Akane had gotten up and managed to keep her balance on the ice.

I shrugged.

"Your Call." I couldn't see her face in the fog but being above it gave me a clear view of her location. I simply Dropped down and bashed my elbow into the back of her had with all my magically enhanced strength. Then slipped and landed on my ass when my feet made contact with the floor covered in ice.

"Ow." I got up and kicked Akane's still form. She had been knocked unconscious. With a mental command to my ring I dispelled the fog.

"WAAA! MY BABYS DEAD!"

Kasumi made her way over to Akane as fast as she could on the still melting ice. When she got there she knelt down and checked her over.

"She's alright just a bad bump to the head." I released a breath I hadn't realized id been holding.

"Victory is mine."

"I CHALLENGE YOU!" Ranma had gotten up some time during the short fight.

"No."

"What!?"

"I would have nothing to gain." Everyone seemed vary angry at me. I decided to make my exit.

I walked over to Nabiki. She looked at me.

"What." She sounded pissed off

"My sign?" she frowned and left the room. After a few minute's she came back and handed me the sign.

On my why out of the Tendo's yard I herd Nabiki.

"You'll pay for this" I suddenly found myself regretting my decision to test the ring here.


End file.
